[CONGO] Outreach To Angola

[Kelly the Mad]

THE FOLLOWING IS SECURE
​

To: Emperor of Angola, Ngola Quilongo ( Tano )

Subject: Imperial Conference at the Palais de la Nation

CC:

Greetings. The joy I feel in finally having another proper, true to the earth, un-influenced African nation to cooperate with is unexplainable. Long have I waited with my people for a truly, really African nation to appear, one not corrupted and influenced down to the core by outside imperialist powers. I find it, not just due to our bordering each other but also due to our shared history on the African continent fighting enslavement and imperialism, and our shared understanding of the importance of a strong figurehead, essential that we meet in person at the earliest convenience. If necessary, I can have our air elements escort your own personal aircraft to Kinshasa, where you can land at N'Dolo airport while N'Djili airport is under reconstruction. From there we can escort you to my home, the Palais de la Nation, and we can together discuss the future of our nations together. I look forward to meeting you.

Best Regards, Omari Gowon, Emperor of the Congo.

 

[Tano]

Imperial Office of Angola​

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From: Emperor Quilongo, Angolan Imperial Republic

To: Emperor Gowon, Imperial State of the Congo Kelly the Mad

Subject: RE: Imperial Conference at the Palais de la Nation

Dear Emperor Gowon,

It is of great pleasure to receive your message and I much appreciate you personally taking the time to reach out and establish communications between our governments.

I am pleased to hear that even in our initial thoughts on one-another, our perspectives and understandings are very much aligned. Indeed, with political chaos and simultaneous absenteeism that is the African continent and its respective governments, it is a significant relief to know that a like-minded state exists on the continent, never mind the fact of being neighbours.
I shall of course accept your generous invitation. I will have a delegation assembled to accompany my visit and will be prepared to depart Luanda as soon as you notify that you're ready to receive us.

Sincerely,

Emperor Quilongo of the Angolan Imperial Republic.

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This message is classified and has been encrypted​

 

[Kelly the Mad]

THE FOLLOWING IS SECURE
​

To: Emperor of Angola, Ngola Quilongo ( Tano )

Subject: Imperial Conference at the Palais de la Nation

CC:

I am glad that you are a well-minded individual, we will await your arrival at your earliest convenience. I look forward to our conference.

Best Regards, Omari Gowon, Emperor of the Congo

 

[Tano]

Imperial Office of Angola​

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From: Emperor Quilongo, Angolan Imperial Republic

To: Emperor Gowon, Imperial State of the Congo Kelly the Mad

Subject: RE: Imperial Conference at the Palais de la Nation

Dear Emperor Gowon,

I wish to inform you of the departure of our flight from Luanda and we are currently making way to Kishasa

Sincerely,

Emperor Quilongo of the Angolan Imperial Republic.

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This message is classified and has been encrypted

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The Emperor along with his delegation consisting of relevant advisors, translators and diplomats would board their flight at Aeroporto de Luanda and make their way to Kinshasa. On approach to Congolese airspace, the pilots would inform the Congolese Air Force of their presence. As they closer approach N'Dolo airport, they would inform N'Dolo airport air traffic control and awaite to be given permission to land.​

 

[Kelly the Mad]

Upon entrance into Congolese airspace, a lone MiG-23 would line itself up alongside the Angolan flight. Wagging its wingtips, it would accompany them throughout Congolese airspace, finally pulling away dramatically as they arrived at N'Dolo airport. Air Traffic Control would dictate the aircraft to land, and as the plane taxied to its parking spot, a Mi-26M helicopter would land just a few dozen feet away. The loading ramp would lower, revealing a series of plush seats and a pair of well-dressed waiters. A red carpet had been laid down on the floor, and specialty noise-canceling headphones would be provided to the advisors and diplomats as well as the Emperor. The pilot would personally step out, bowing to the Angolan Emperor before saluting and re-boarding. In seconds, they were airborne, on the short trip to the yards of the Palais de la Nation.

Landing next to the water, the Angolan host would be instructed to disembark. The helicopter would immediately take off once more, returning to its typical assignment. Now, finally, Omari Gowon would step out of the mansion to greet the Angolans. He would shake the Emperor's hand with a fervor, a broad smile across his face.

"Emperor Quilongo! It is such a pleasure to host you in my country, this shall help facilitate talks about our two nations and what lies ahead for us both. Come inside, I have some tea and snacks. I'm sure you will enjoy them."

Tano

 

[Tano]

After being guided into the helicopter and sitting comfortably, the Emperor would glance out of the window and observe the Congolese megacity that is Kinshasa, whilst remaining quiet and keeping occupied with his thoughts.
Subsequently following the landing of the helicopter, the Emperor would step out, slowly placing one foot in front of the other being careful to not slip as his eyes adjusted to the glaring sunlight. Seeing Gowon further ahead, he sped up his pace and greeted his counterpart:
"Ah Emperor Gowon, thank you for the invitation. I've never seen so much of one city in a single day. Well thank you, I'm sure I will enjoy. Please, lead the way, I'll get lost easily otherwise." The Emperor joked.
He would follow Gowon a step behind whilst the remaining delegation tailed him.

Kelly the Mad

 

[Kelly the Mad]

They would walk through the doublewide back entrance to the building, entering its main hall, with ceilings towering high above the men, likely the highest the Angolans had ever been under. Besides the Palace of the People, the seat of the Imperial Diet, the Palace of the Nation was the largest and most magnificent building between the two countries. It was designed in the 50s for Belgian Colonial Governers and had been converted to a symbol of African independence by the country.

He led them through a series of interior doorways and a small sunny courtyard before finally entering a long room with a long, heavy table, that was so large it had had to be custom-built inside of the room. Already seated were an array of high-ranking staff and lower-ranking clerks for recording and waiting upon their guests. The Emperor would sit down on the opposite side of the table, to let the Angolans sit down closest to the doors. As everyone settled down, a dozen men in well put together pinstripe suits would walk out and begin disseminating drinks and smokes to the visiting and local parties. In total, after the waiters had left, the table was line with several dozen men of both nationalities and many more bottles of wine and liquor, stacks of cigars, and expensive appetizers.

"Now, if you are all welcomed, we can get down to the nitty-gritty of politics, yes?"

Tano

 

[Kelly the Mad]

Tano

 

[Tano]

Following his host through the Palace, the Emperor would admire the grander of the walls and ceiling. As he was taking in the sights, it reminded him that government still needed to construct a palace of its own in Luanda, residing in the Assembleia Nacional was not an ideal long-term arrangement.
As they entered the conference room, the Emperor saw the Congolese officials already present. He nodded to them and briefly introduced himself. Him and his accompanying delegation would approach their seats. Waiting to be invited to sit, the Emperor would sit first and the delegation followed suit.

Seated and prepared, Quilongo responded, "Yes, I think we're all comfortably seated and ready to go." He then indicated to his advisors besides him, the advisor presented a closed paper file and placed it onto the table in front of her. She turned over the cover allowing Quilongo to see the first page. The Emperor leaned over and quickly scanned the document's page and continued to speak to his hosts, "There's certainly a few topics on the agenda to keep us busy for a while. Where do you wish to start?"

Kelly the Mad

 

[Kelly the Mad]

"Our first and foremost concern is adopting a mutual defense treaty between our nations. It may seem a tad bit early, but considering our proximity and your fledgling armed forces it is only beneficial to your people. We want to ensure that your nation can thrive, and so we offer you our protection. As well as this, we are looking to fund infrastructure projects within your country in the future. These would include industrial complexes, housing districts, and airports. We are also willing to participate in the construction and upkeep of several naval bases along Angola's coast.

In relation to this, I would like to enact an open-border policy. Anyone with a Congolese or Angolan passport may pass freely between the two countries, without any border checks. This would also expand to ports. What do you think so far?"

Tano

 

[Tano]

Quilongo happy and warm appearance turned to an awkward and sarcastic smile as he took offense by his counterparts naïve and ignorant remarks. His optimistic approach became dulled as a feeling of disappointment arose within.
He let out a sigh, then spoke:
"A mutual defence pact is something we will not agree to, not with any country and certainly not a state whose military is so very active in conflicts outside of its borders. We Angolans have committed ourselves to a policy of passive rearmament in order to meet the security demands arising from potential direct threats to Angolan sovereignty and its' peoples. We're not in the business of building a military infrastructure nor network to engage in conflicts outside our borders and, most importantly, have nothing to do with us. With the Congo's very well document record of being militarily active abroad in recent years, a military defense pact will surely bring more trouble to Angola than it's worth, as the likelihood of us being dragged into an unnecessary conflict in the foreseeable future would be abnormally high should we sign such agreement. Whilst we are obviously willing to cooperate with the Congo as equals, we will not have our military forces affiliated with the conflicts you decide to intervene in.

Now, as for infrastructure investment. We are currently in the process of funding the biggest construction boom in Africa's history and of course all sources of input and investment are being and will be considered. That said, whilst your offer is kind, it does bring me to question the motives. See, the Congo's economic performance lags behind that of Angola's by almost every measurement, including GDP, GDP per capita, health, unemployment and so on. Given that your own country is in such desperate need of investment itself, I'm unsure why you're offering to finance project's in a country that coping better economically.
Furthermore, specifically to your request to construct naval bases in our territory, we have no interest in constructing unnecessary military assets.

See, I came here with the expectation that we will be treated as equals and already I'm very disappointed to find that that is not how you see it. Your request of a military alliance, your insistence of providing 'protection' to us, alongside your request to to construct naval bases on Angolan soil, on top of your use of language to convey such requests, makes it clear that you see Angola as a subordinate for the Congo to utilize to fulfil its own ambition. This makes me very disappointed and certainly does not bode well for a first-impression. Let's continue discussions but I highly recommend you review your points of discussion and amend them so that we are treated like the equals we are."

Kelly the Mad

 

[Kelly the Mad]

The Emperor's face would go straight. Taking a deep swig from a bottle of plantain-based Lotoko, a taste he acquired in his days as a revolutionary on the run, he looked the Angolan Emperor dead in the eyes. Without a word, the look spoke volumes. It was a look of superiority. A look of contempt at being talked to this was in his own home. He had offered these poor people, in the same boat as him just a year before, the golden opportunity that had once saved him and eventually his country. And they shot it down, not only that but insulted him over it.

"We could rearrange it then. A guarantee of your independence. You would not have to join us in war even if we were attacked, for we can hold our own as we have shown before. Consider it a gift. If you are ever attacked, we will defend you until your enemies are either burning on stakes, buried in shallow graves, or waterlogged on the seafloor. And I will have you know that your numbers are clearly outdated. Our economy is booming, stronger than ever before. Yours, however, could use some... Improvement. You ought to put some of your oh so vast wealth that apparently rockets far ahead of my own to good use defending your country, lest you offend some greater power. I assure you, in the modern world insults are taken to heart. Not dissimilar to the vendettas and blood feuds of our own lands, no?" As the Emperor spoke, a number of uniformed men from the Congolese side of the table would stand up and exit, each pulling out a cell phone. The diplomats around the table would begin to fidget, and the armed guards would stand stiffer than before.

Tano

 

[Tano]

Registering this sudden change to a hostile attitude, the Emperor would turn to his advisor with his eyebrows raised and eyes widened; a look that clearly said 'Is he for real?'. A mixed sensation of confusion, shock and comedic disbelief would sweep across the Angolan delegation as the Congolese' remarks left them lost with words. With every second that passed, the realisation set in that the Congo and Angola were not the natural allies they initially thought they were.

"...Wow...Where do I begin?..." In a calm voice, he continued, "This is the first time we've met, in fact, this is the first time our nations have ever communicated with one another...and yet it seems that the only thing you talk about is war. Why? We've just concluded a 25 year civil war, do you seriously believe we have any interest in waging another? As for your economy, to put it to you bluntly, the most recent data suggests that your nation cant afford to bankroll yet another conflict, I'm surprised you've found financial streams to bankroll your current conflict. If you believe anything else, I'm afraid you're terribly misinformed.
Quite frankly we see little reason to spend our income on these rockets to defend our nation, unless you're going to give us a reason?
You invite us here claiming that we would find common ground with an ally. We came here expecting that, expecting to establish trade routes, cooperate on security, solve energy crisis' and so on. Yet in this incredibly brief conversation, it's apparent that you've issued us with a thinly-veiled ultimatum accompanied with threats. Why? What on earth do you seek to gain from this?"

He would pause as he noticed the counterparts delegation become more distracted.

"I'm sorry, have we become so boring that your diplomats have lost interest in diplomacy?"

Kelly the Mad

 

[Kelly the Mad]

The Emperor would take yet another swig from his bottle. At around this point, you would notice that the bottle next to it was not full but in fact empty. He had been drinking before the meeting even kicked off. And not just that, but the alcohol he was drinking, the locally and illegally produced moonshine-type liquor, was of an extremely high ABV percentage of around 60%. The amount he had drunk should have had him dead. But he continued nonetheless.

"I will have you know, 'Emperor'," At this, he would make air quotes with his fingers, "That my country very much can and is very much willing to bankroll another conflict. And as it just so happens, the closer the war is to home the less expensive and more convenient it is to run. There is your reason. We were looking for an ally, and instead what we found was a little man with little ambitions." He would laugh, and while simultaneously taking a swig he looked around at his diplomats, obviously expecting a laugh out of them. They found his lack of humor at the moment curious and faltered before letting out half-baked laughs. The face of one of the diplomats nearest to him flushed, and he began to excuse himself before the Emperor smacked him hard across his face.

"You do not excuse yourself, I excuse you!" The emperor shouted into the man's face. He made a hand gesture and two of the guards dragged the diplomat away by his elbows, the man crying out in another language as he disappeared behind a wide set of double doors. The Emperor grew a broad grin after seeing the looks on the Angolan's faces. He took another swig. "Excuse me, please, gentlemen." the emperor said in a low voice. His grin contorted into a worried frown. He stumbled up and out of the room. The distinct sounds of throwing up could be heard through the wooden doors. Several guards would rush out to the Emperor, closing the doors behind them. The diplomats still at the table would blanch before most excused themselves and left out a different door. Finally, the man who had been slapped, the last sitting at the table, would stand up. He stuck out a hand towards the Angolan Emperor.

"Emperor. I sincerely apologize for my monarch. He seems to have lost his head with the drink. If you choose to leave here and now out of insult, that would be fully understood and can be arranged. If not, I would like to invite you to my private offices where we can talk... properly. On economic matters. I have two key points I would like to make. I truly hope that we can get over this... how would you say... hurdle?"

Tano

 

[Tano]

The Angolan delegation watched in complete shock and horror as their counterpart performed their act. Throughout it they we silent, the unpredictability of the Congolese Emperor terrified them. Finally spoken to at the end of the fiasco, the Emperor found voice:

"A hurdle! This is no hurdle! This is a brick wall. In fact, negotiations with a brick wall would be far more productive than with the Congo. This summit has concluded; after a grand 5 minutes around the table, it's concluded and we'll take our leave." The Emperor and his delegation stood out of their seats as they were about to leave. The Emperor sighed, "There's still a slither of optimism in me that our nations can sit at the table across from each other to have a civilised conversation, but I nor any representative of my government will engage and put our faith into backchannel talks with an official who has no authority. When a legitimate representative with decision-making powers is ready to talk again, we will expect their call and we will listen. But we will not be reaching out to your government again." With that said, the delegation would leave to make their own way back to the airport and Luanda.

Kelly the Mad

 

[Kelly the Mad]

The diplomat would raise his hand when the Angolan Emperor mentioned his lack of power.

"Excuse me, your highness, but I do in fact have authority. I am the acting foreign affairs minister. Since the departure of Mrs. Okereke, I have been running behind the scenes. However, in his current state, the emperor has failed to make any attempt to officially appoint me... Rest assured, I have the most draw on my government of anyone who would be willing to talk to you after my own rulers' ill-doings and sayings against you. Once more, I deeply apologize. If you just come with me, I can handle your grievances. No alcohol, however. I don't drink."

Tano