[EGY] Message to Myanmar: Concerning Monarchism and the Current World Order

[Kelly the Mad]

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To: Myanma Department of Foreign Affairs
From: Zero Jabour, Chief of International Affairs

Subject: Concerning Monarchism and the Current World Order

Security Clearance: Government; Protected

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To whom it may concern,

Congratulations on your nation's newfound prominence on the world stage. We here in Egypt understand the struggle of overcoming internal strife to rise above and onto the global stage. That fight is hard, and any nation that can push through it is deserving of an equal seat in diplomacy. Myanmar's emergence as a nation holding its monarch in reverence is equally impressive and will no doubt be celebrated at home and abroad, certainly in the halls of power here in Cairo.

Myanmar has long been of interest to us in Egypt, not only for your storied history and current leadership but also your proximity to the Terrorist State of Thailand. Similarly to our own experience, it has come to our attention that Myanmar has repeatedly been victimized by the TST. Through this mutual trauma, I believe our nations will be able to see eye to eye on many international issues. I believe Myanmar also holds some respect for anti-imperialist policies, although you should correct me if I am wrong.

Hopefully, here we can establish a formal line of communication.

Best,
Zero Jabour
Chief of International Affairs
Sultanate of Egypt and the Sudan

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Alex

 

[Alex]

Message to the Sultanate of Egypt and the Sudan
Private & Encrypted

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To: Zero Jabour, Chief of International Affairs
From: Me Minkhaung, Queen of Myanmar

Your Excellency,

Your message has been received and reviewed with due attention by Her Majesty's Government.

You are correct in identifying the so-called Socialist Republic of Thailand for what it is — a terrorist state. Our people have long borne the cost of their intrusions. As you have endured imperialist mutilation and survived, so too have we, and from that survival comes understanding. There is value in mutual clarity. Yes, we oppose imperialism, foreign militarism, and destabilization masquerading as diplomacy—all things Thailand have performed throughout their recent international history.

In light of the persistent threat from the Thai state—whose appetite for regional destabilization has not abated—Her Majesty’s Cabinet has been reviewing methods for strengthening cross-river and amphibious mobility along key strategic corridors. It has come to our attention that Egypt possesses the industrial capability to manufacture the GSP-55 Amphibious Tracked Ferry. Myanmar would like to formally inquire whether your government is open to manufacturing and selling 240 units of the GSP-55 for the empire's use in defense and civil contingency operations.

We would be willing to purchase them for $1,700,000.00 per unit, for a total of $408,000,000.00. However, we are open to negotiations.

Sincerely,
Me Minkhaung
Queen of Myanmar, Princess of Hsipaw
Empire of Myanmar

Kelly the Mad

 

[Kelly the Mad]

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To: Me Minkhaung, Queen of Myanmar
From: Zero Jabour, Chief of International Affairs

Subject: Concerning Monarchism and the Current World Order

Security Clearance: Government; Protected

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Your Majesty,

I am ecstatic to hear that you agree with our assessment of the Thai Rogue State. Their intrusions have certainly gone on for too long; they have even attempted to utilize international law to violate Egyptian territorial sovereignty. It is essential to note that, at present, Egypt does not recognize a legitimate government in Thailand and maintains a total rejection of diplomatic contact.

Concerning your request for procurement, we are very much open to producing tools for Myanmar. However, before we solidify a deal in that respect, it is important to His Excellency, Our Sultan, that we have a full and detailed understanding of Myanmar's political and ideological situation, as well as your stance on a number of international issues.

Firstly, I understand that Myanmar is an Empire. How much control do you have over your government, Your Majesty? How much control does your government hold over you? Are the people involved in your government through democracy? Please understand that we fully comprehend the complexity of government, especially when synthesizing the governments of the past and present, as our nations do. We understand that sometimes, extra measures must be taken to maintain balance.

What is Your Majesty's stance on the situation developing in Turkey? What is your stance on the current status of Syria as a political wasteland? What is your position regarding the Catalan independence movement in Spain? How do you view the Thai Rogue State's interference in Egyptian affairs via their attempt to illegally secure a mandate to cross through sovereign Egyptian territory, in the form of the Suez Canal?

The Sultan is currently optimistic about future cooperation between our governments. However, he has reservations, as any ruler ought to. If you could answer these questions with sincerity, I believe his reservations may evaporate.

Humbly,
Zero Jabour
Chief of International Affairs
Sultanate of Egypt and the Sudan

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Alex

 

[Alex]

Message to the Sultanate of Egypt and the Sudan
Private & Encrypted

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To: Zero Jabour, Chief of International Affairs
From: Me Minkhaung, Queen of Myanmar

Your Excellency,

Regarding your inquiry: the Empire of Myanmar is a constitutional monarchy with the Crown holding executive supremacy in national security, foreign policy, and state leadership. The National Reconciliation Council, composed of representatives from both the Crown and elected federal entities, advises on internal policy and governance. The public maintains direct participation through a federated democratic framework at the regional level, ensuring that while stability is preserved by the monarchy, the people retain meaningful civic influence.

On international matters:

• Turkey: Myanmar supports democracy as a principle and sees Turkey’s internal situation with concern. While we respect the sovereignty of other nations, we do not support communism, nor do we overlook the fact that the Thai Rogue State maintains a military base in Turkey. This is unacceptable. Any nation hosting Thai forces is enabling a known violator of regional peace and international norms. Myanmar would like to see Thailand diplomatically and militarily isolated from all responsible governments.
• Syria: The Empire has no opinion. It is unfortunate that their republic has collapsed and we hope that soon they will find stability and democracy once again. Until then, there is nothing to do or to be said.
• Catalonia: Myanmar has no interest in Europe’s internal fractures. Catalonia, like all European disputes, is not our concern and we maintain neutrality on the matter.
• Thai Actions Against Egypt: I must admit I am not entirely up-to-date on the matter you speak of. We do see the Suez Canal as an international point of travel by sea and as such should be permitted to be passed by those who seek it for civilian and commercial means. However, if Thailand attempted to strong-arm the international community into forcing Egypt into letting Thai military vessels pass then we see that as a complete violation of what an international community and an international point of travel should be for. But if I am to give you a proper opinion, I will need to know the details, if you don't mind.

Sincerely,
Me Minkhaung
Queen of Myanmar, Princess of Hsipaw
Empire of Myanmar

Kelly the Mad

 

[Kelly the Mad]

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To: Me Minkhaung, Queen of Myanmar
From: Zero Jabour, Chief of International Affairs

Subject: Concerning Monarchism and the Current World Order

Security Clearance: Government; Protected

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Your Majesty,

I am very glad to see that our nation's values align closely with one another. Our systems of governance are not far removed from each other, with the exception that Our Sultan holds unfettered power, and our democratically elected Parliament legislates for the entirety of the nation at the Sultan's allowance.

Your stance on Turkey is very much shared with our own. We fear not only for their worryingly unstable and uncontrolled government but also for their long-term viability as a nation. Their apparent willingness to invite Rogue Thai assets into their borders brings up serious questions about their independence. We are deeply concerned that Turkey will soon develop into a liability for the entire Mideast, a host of a parasitic foreign intervention.

As for the Suez crisis, many months ago, Thailand brazenly executed an Egyptian diplomat on a goodwill mission. On live television. Not just any diplomat, but our Chief of International Affairs, Moustafa Asker. Gunned down in cold blood in the street while being welcomed for a diplomatic visit. Terrorism. Immediately following, they kidnapped Asker's entire security detachment and held them for months, torturing them without charge. They were eventually released, but still struggle with post-traumatic stress disorder.

Following this blatant act of terrorism and violation of international law, the Thai Rogue State attempted to pass combat ships through the Suez Canal to exert its influence in the Mediterranean. This was unacceptable to Egypt, allowing a terrorist state, no longer formally recognized, to pass weapons of war through our canal. So, the ships were intercepted and turned away. The Thai Rogue State replied by opening a flippant international case against us, which eventually ruled on highly outdated grounds that our canal was to be free transit for all military craft.

This was, understandably, unacceptable, and we have refused to accept this case coming from a body we do not recognize and supported by a terrorist state. No Thai ships have yet passed through the Suez Canal since, and they will not be allowed to in the near future. Our records from the exchanges will be attached below.

Now that we have come to understand a greater level of agreement with your nation, we are willing to sell you the requested equipment. If you transfer the stated funds to our government, we will immediately begin production of the wet-gap crossing equipment.

Myanmar seems poised similarly to Egypt in that it understands the importance of a powerful standing army for regional peace, especially when surrounded by hostile neighbors. Do you think it would be acceptable for our nations to exchange a small military liaison group, a few dozen high-ranking staff members each, for discussions on military planning and strategy? I would hope that this could be a first step towards a potential military exercise in the future, to further ready our nations in this tumultuous time.

Humbly,
Zero Jabour
Chief of International Affairs
Sultanate of Egypt and the Sudan

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Alex

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To: <Ministry of International Affairs of the Sultanate of Egypt> Kelly the Mad From: <Sarabun@mfa.mail.go.th> Subject: Thailand’s Call for Egypt’s Immediate Compliance with International Law Security Type: NSST 1.0 Architecture | Secret and Encrypted

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To the Ministry of International Affairs of Egypt,

The Ministry of Foreign Affairs of the Socialist Republic of Thailand extends its shameless greeting to the Ministry of International Affairs of the Sultan of Egypt and writes to address a matter of utmost gravity concerning adherence to international law.

As unequivocally affirmed by the International Court of Justice (ICJ) in the advisory opinion on the right of passage through the Suez Canal (ICJ/AO/0002), Thailand demands Egypt's immediate compliance with the following principles, each of which must be observed to maintain the integrity of international law and the sanctity of sovereign equality:

1. The "principle of freedom of transit through the Suez Canal" has been recognized as customary international law and must be upheld without discrimination or obstruction.
2. The foundational principles of the 1888 Constantinople Convention govern the operation of the Suez Canal and obligate all states to ensure free, impartial, and uninterrupted passage under all circumstances.
3. Sovereign equality, a cornerstone of international law, guarantees that every state enjoys inherent rights independent of external recognition or interference. Thailand insists that these rights be respected in full.
4. Access to the canal must be restricted only under extraordinary and narrowly justified conditions, such as threats to national security or force majeure, in accordance with international legal standards.
5. In the absence of a formal state of war or binding international court judgment to the contrary, there exists no lawful basis for the imposition of a blockade against the Socialist Republic of Thailand or its vessels.

Thailand’s position is unwavering. Egypt’s failure to fulfill these obligations constitutes a direct affront to the principles of peace, equity, and justice, principles upon which the international community depends for stability and progress. Such dereliction will not only tarnish Egypt’s global standing but invite scrutiny and corrective measures by the global community.

Thailand reaffirms its enduring commitment to the rule of law and the collective responsibility of nations to ensure its observance. We expect Egypt to demonstrate its dedication to these shared ideals through immediate and full compliance with its legal obligations.

Yours Sincerely,

Surakiart Sathirathai
Minister of Foreign Affairs
Republic of Thailand

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